Sarah Tan – Personal Development

Executive coach and author Marshall Goldsmith wrote, “Feedback is a gift that only other can give.”  If that is so, why do so many people have trouble giving and receiving feedback?
Power is the culprit for much of the trouble we have giving and receiving feedback. When we give feedback we may really be trying to control people. Our resistance to receiving feedback is possibly a resistance to change. 

It can be very useful to clarify the reason for giving feedback before doling it out.  Here are five different types of feedback and suggestions for each. 

Evaluation Feedback: Evaluation Feedback is the most common that you will find in the workplace.It’s also the least helpful. The timeframe at which evaluation feedback comes is always at the end. The end of the performance year. After a week-long class is over. The end of a project.  True, we all need to be willing to rate ourselves, and the evaluation feedback will improve our performance next time.  But why not give and get feedback when we can learn from it real time?

Real-Time Performance Feedback: This type of feedback is usually given by someone whose success depends on you; for example your boss.  While it may be couched as an observation or something for you to think about, when someone shares performance feedback, they intend for you to change your behavior.

It is helpful to get clarifying information when you think that you are receiving performance feedback.  Try asking, “what exactly would you like me to stop or start doing?” Once you’ve gotten the feedback, make the change!

Fine-Tuning: Fine-tuning feedback generally comes from people who are satisfied with the overall job you are doing, but see some areas you could tweak to get even better. One of the best examples of fine-tuning feedback I ever received was from a course participant.  She told me she enjoyed my course and then asked if she could share some feedback.  She shared that when I nodded my head while listening to people in the audience, it made her feel as though I was rushing.  WOW!  This blew me away because I had no idea that my behavior was having this negative impact.

The key to giving fine-tuning feedback is to share the impact a behavior has on you or others.  The giver is not necessarily trying to control or change you. The person receiving the feedback has the chance to decide whether to change or not change, the person giving the feedback is merely sharing how they are impacted.

Feed-Forward: Goldsmith came up with this one years ago. It means giving someone suggestions in advance about how to behave rather than waiting for them to fail and beating them up afterward. For example, my husband had a presentation to give to the executive leadership committee at work, which was the first time he ever did anything like that.  His boss gave him great feed-forward about how to dress, when to speak, how much detail to go into, etc.

Slap Upside the Head: Two years ago, a colleague who is also a great friend sat me down and said, “You are making yourself and others miserable.  What’s going on?”

Only very good friends can give slap upside the head feedback.  It involves personal feedback that people share out of concern and caring. In his book, Who’s Got Your Back, Keith Ferrazzi gives some great examples of this feedback along with the assertion that we all desperately need people in our lives who care enough to give it.

A person giving slap upside the head feedback isn’t giving it with the intent of controlling you or even to change you because it matters to the person giving the feedback. The feedback is given because they understand your personal goals and see how your behavior is keeping you from reaching those goals.
Summary
If you are giving feedback:  think through what you want to achieve and give feedback that is appropriate.Remember that if you are not in a position of authority, evaluation feedback is not appropriate.  You can lead a horse to water . . .

Feedback Receivers: We all suffer from a lack of self-awareness at times and feedback is the only way we can learn what our blind spots are.   Even if you ultimately disagree with the feedback, accept it as a gift from the person giving it. If it’s evaluation or performance feedback, you have a chance to change in order to do better in the eyes of others.  If it’s fine-tuning or slap upside the head feedback, you have the choice to change or not.

Wendy Mack is a consultant, speaker, and change catalyst who specializes in helping leaders mobilize energy for change, For more articles and resources on leading and communicating change visit: www.WendyMack.com.

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Financial crisis, rapid changes in the office, new stricter and more stringent policies, higher premiums, rising cost of commodities, etc. all of which amount to more stress for people and further emphasizing the need for better and more effective stress management techniques or methods. There are generally two approaches which you can go about when aiming to relieve stress. There’s the personal (self-help) approach and then there’s the professionally aided approach conducted through stress management training.

If you are on the lookout for the best then none could probably be given as much of the factors that need to be considered falls on you. Your needs for example are different from other people, same as with the problems that you face, meaning; you will be needing a different approach and solution to your problem compared to other people.

In terms of options you have plenty. You can choose from either online or offline stress management training courses that are being offered And as said, everything will depend on your preference. If you are more comfortable learning the techniques at home then you might want to take a look at online options. If you are a more of a hands on person, or you want to share or hear other people opinions, stories, or facts about stress then, offline training might be the one for you.

But regardless of these factors or the different methods that you will be using, the fact still remains that getting stress management training can be beneficial to you. Stress management training, with the use of highly interactive learning programs, teaches individuals a lot of different techniques that will help them improve their organizational skills, rationality when it comes to handling problems as well as relaxation techniques.

Stress management training aims at helping individuals suffering from too much stress as well as anxiety. Not only that, these training programs have also been known to help people get through addictions (alcohol, gambling, smoking etc.), depression, and other forms of physical or psychological ailments. The training can be taken in short courses, which can be started and finished within a week or so, or can also be a part of an on-going therapeutic activity for those who need it.

Covering areas ranging from effective time management, leadership and communication skills, assertiveness, and relaxation, stress management training can help you in becoming an effective individual. If you want more specific details about each of the trainings being given, try searching the web and you will surely be able to get a lot of relevant and useful information. So if you want to get rid of stress while accomplishing a whole lot more, learn more about stress management training as soon as you can. 

Looking for excellent tips on stress management training which could be help you to treat your anger problems fast? Be sure to visit http://www.managingstresssecrets.com and get your free 10-day mini-ecourse right now.

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Simply getting by at work is not going to last very long. By doing the bare minimum you cannot expect to get ahead, receive promotions or more importantly, receive those much needed raises. However, there are people who can help you set personal business goals and help motivate you through leadership mentoring. Look around you and take stock of what successful business men and women are doing to get ahead. They are not just sitting around waiting for an opportunity. They are making their own opportunities. You need a business coach to help you do the same thing.

Leadership mentoring is not the same thing as being a coach. Mentoring involves a one-on-one action between someone more knowledgeable about a subject or situation and him or her instructing another person. It is common for a business coach to be confused with a mentoring program but there are differences. A couch is there to guide you along the way and let you make your own decisions. The other is there to show you how to do something.

Many companies will bring in a coach consultant to help their employees when the business is beginning to flag. It is a way to help bring back the company into operating once again at a higher level of efficiency. You have probably heard of motivational camps where employees are brought in and play team games with one another. This creates and fosters a competitive atmosphere but lets employees bond with each other.

Business coaches can not perform miracles and should not be promising great achievements. Those who do may be operating under fraudulent means. This is to say that a coach should not make grand promises to up sales by fifty percent or have employees thinking that the coaching process will automatically result in advancements and promotions. This is simply not the case. Coaching people should be more about showing them that they can rely on themselves to make the necessary changes to help the business operate better.

Many corporations are now seeing the benefit of bringing in a motivational business coach to help their business improve. It does improve employee morale and it does work in helping to raise productivity. The coach must be adept at motivating a single person and at group mentoring situations as well. You can benefit from the coach by listening to what he or she has to say and implementing their life tips into your own life. Then you will see work as more of a career than just a nine-to-five job.

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Numerous people have difficulties setting personal goals and then following them. It can be because of a lack of self-discipline, lack of focus or maybe a mismanaged lifestyle that has them moving around in a circle, never making any headway. Whatever the reason maybe, when personal goals are not being achieved, the quality of life for that individual can suffer a severe downturn. If you are one amongst these people which appear to be spinning your wheels when it concerns personal goals, then you may need to look at life mentoring.

Life and personal development coaching is all about assisting other people to achieve their goals and their dreams. A coach can accomplish this by leading by example, offering life tips and employing effectual coaching skills that come from various disciplines, like psychology or sociology. As a life coach, he or she must help the client examine their current living circumstances and assist them reach a decision as to where they would like to be in life. As well as offering tips and guiding you along, they will also assist you in getting over any obstacles that may pop up along the way.

One thing to be conscious of is that a life coach is not a fix all and cannot solve your difficulties on your behalf. If you have alcohol, drug or  psychological related problems or there are issues relating to abuse, your mentor will not be qualified to help you with these types of problem. Even though they are not qualified to do such a job, they can provide a good example and may assist you to seek out specialist assistance for your particular issues. Your mentor is not there to push you towards anything which you are not prepared for and neither should they show you the way. They simply provide a shoulder should you need their help in addressing particular life transitions.

One important aspect that you should be conscious of is that there are no professional qualifications or licensing needed to become a life coach or for leadership mentoring. There are organizations that do offer membership but there is no schooling needed in order to be a mentor. With that in mind, when you are looking for a life coach, you should be extremely suspicious of anybody who claims to be able to alter your life or help you to achieve any unreasonable goals.

Many folks get a genuine feeling of gratification when they can assist others succeed in achieving their goals, ambitions and aspirations. To these folks, life coaching is very much a way of life. One thing to be aware of if you have are looking to start coaching other folks yourself, and that is that you never get anything for nothing and it will take a lot of hard work to become a life coach. Nevertheless, the end results are very much worth the effort.

Every so often, life has a tendency to be overwhelming and it is at these times that individuals find themselves being pushed off course as far as their goals are concerned. Life coaching provides much needed motivation and helps put the person back on the road to achieving success.

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